Matt’s Story
Growing up I went to church every Sunday and Wednesday for youth group. I always remember having to leave whatever it was that was super fun on a Wednesday afternoon to go to church and it was the worst. And every Sunday always seemed like the nicest day of the week but I knew I couldn’t go out and play because I had to go to church. I remember seeing Ferris Buhler’s Day Off and thinking to myself man he has some good ideas I could use on Sundays. But my parents told me if I was too sick to go to church I was too sick to go play football. So I always went. Don’t get me wrong I liked the friends and stories and games we did play at church it’s just I didn’t like having to leave what I was doing because I was afraid I was going to miss something important. The funny thing is that if I wouldn’t have left I would have missed the most important thing in my life. So I began to start listening at church and trying to get a hold on who God or Jesus was and I feel like my relationship with Him started out pretty well. I liked reading my bible and my dad and I would go over questions after we ate at Kewpies on Wednesday nights before church. Then I started thinking about my faith more often and listening more and reading more and asking questions more. I learned a few things: there is a god and I’m not Him…but I’m pretty sure I want to know Him.
So this started my journey. I went to church camps and they always had “altar calls” and I went and said I want Jesus to be my Savior but I was never sure what it meant. But then, in the summer before freshmen year of high school I was at a camp called Senior High Alive and the speaker’s name was Rob Champion. He gave a message called baggage check. All he did was talk about the fact that WE are SINNERS. We mess up every day and that we are born into a broken life because of man’s sin. It could be the worst thought I’ve ever thought, that my good deeds aren’t good enough and that all my works are nothing. But then there was the punch-line. I don’t have to walk around with that on my mind every day, I realized the baggage I carried with me everyday could be dropped off at the cross and left for the Son of the Living God to carry on his shoulders and take to the cross. This changed my life but I don’t know if I realized it until much later.
I thought for a really long time that the only way I was going to “believe” in Jesus Christ as my Savior I would have something miraculous happen to me. All throughout high school I did and said the “right” things. I felt like if I did this God would find favor in me and by doing that I would become closer to Him and he would find me and reveal Himself to me. So, even though I learned at camp I didn’t have to do anything but accept God’s free gift of grace I would be saved, I still tried to impress everyone. With advice or things I did or said I tried really hard. But, as I began to grow up (though I’m not sure I ever will grow up) and began to build relationships with my youth pastor and different relationship with my parents and family I found out that my works will not save me. I think that one of the most discouraging yet, one of the most inspirational things ever said to me was something that Rick, my first youth pastor, said all the time. He always told us that my goodness is never going to be good enough, but His Grace Is. The bible says the wages of sin is death, but if I offer up my life to Christ I will live forever with Him.
I learned a lot in high school. I started to read and pray and enjoy worshiping the Lord a lot more. I do feel that I have a relationship with the Lord and I get to enjoy that every day. But here I sit today, still messing up and not giving everything I am to God. All I can do is try to put my faith and trust in him because like I said, MY goodness is NEVER going to be good enough….but the One who came to rescue everyone, you and me, His Grace is All I’ll ever need.
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